I’ve just spent 4 intense days in a remote cottage in Scotland. I was there with a client to explore how far we can push the dynamics of Dominance and submission together. As this is the first time I’ve done this I wanted to document it and, as you’re a bunch of nosey buggers, I suspected you’d like to read that documentation. Over the next few days I’ll be sharing a day-by-day account in a series of blog posts.
About our relationship
I’ve known B for about 7 months. We meet for sessions every 3 or 4 weeks, usually of 4 hours, and almost always followed by dinner and chats. We share a broad spectrum of kinky interests, and a taste for the absurd and obscene. We’ve also spent time together outside of play to improve my session room so we knew before we left that we got on well outside of session time. A few months ago we had a rather extreme visit to a dungeon in Amsterdam for 2 days, so we knew we could travel together.
Preparation
No matter how well you know someone, 4 days total power exchange is an extreme thing to do. I love being in control (a shocking revelation, I know!), but it can be draining in a new situation. We didn’t yet know what the dynamics and boundaries would be; we didn’t know what we would enjoy in on-going D/s; what would work and what wouldn’t. Being responsible for setting up and maintaining that takes a lot of energy. With no pre-set routine and no script to follow we were making it up from scratch. So I started to make lists.
Lots of list. So many lists that I’m going to start using semi-colons in a master list of lists. There was a To Do list; an unorganised list of thoughts and ideas; daily meal plan (we were going to a remote place with few shops); a shopping list; a list of toys, subdivided into toys for me to bring and toys for him to bring; a list of kink things we might do, subdivided into on-going games and time defined scenes; a list of vanilla things we might do; a list of rules for B. These lists were not set in stone. They were just guidelines for me to create a structure that I could deviate from as I wished.
As you can see this was a serious undertaking!
Toys packing lists
As we were staying in a totally vanilla self-catering holiday cottage it was important to bring all the toys we might need. However, I also had to fit them in a suitcase that would go in a plane, so restraint was needed.
- Rope
- Bondage positions printout
- PULSE
- Cuffs
- Carabiners
- Tawse
- Flogger
- Canes
- Paddles
- Blindfold
- Collar
- Nipple clamps
- Stick
- Playing cards
- Dice
- Large boots
- Country gentleman outfit
B has his own collection of toys, so to spread the load I sent him this list of things to take when he flew up the day before.
- E-stim
- Leather Hood
- Chastity cage
- Humbler
- Outfits
- Nipple stretchers
- Spikey gloves
- Gag
- Lube
- Massage oil
- Gaffer tape
- Ice lock timer
- Fancy underwear
- Maid outfit
- Cinderella outfit
- Lady of the Manor outfit
- Clingfilm
Game Ideas
It would be unrealistic to imagine we would be playing all day every day, but I wanted to have a few on-going games that took little effort on my part, but helped keep B in the submissive headspace. Again these were just ideas rather than fully formed games and tasks.
- I chose what B wears each day
- Dressing up as maid/Cinderella for domestic duties
- B wears chastity cage at all times
- B cooks all food
- Dinner served to me at table. He eats elsewhere
- I control how much he eats, when and how
- B to makes beds, keep place clean
- B keep toys organised
- PULSE testing extensive
- Long electrics play
- Lengthy bondage
- Practice positions as shown in printout/B as furniture
- Whipping/flogging
- Games to earn orgasms
- Boots wearing and teasing
- I play Lady of the Manor in the dress
- Play country gentleman in a suit
The Journey
Time flew by and before I knew it, it was time to leave London. My new personal assistant came and cleaned so I would have a lovely house to return to and drove me to the airport. I was grateful for the relative calm of London City Airport, contrary to my adrenaline fuelled restlessness.
From Edinburgh there was a long, long drive in a sexy Mercedes Benz, up north in the dark. I spent a lot of it peering out the window, wondering at the beauty of the full moon and shadowy landscape I could only barely admire. We arrived at a little cottage in an unknown black landscape at 4am, and I immediately fell asleep.
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